Last article, we explored how to respond When Life Gets Hard. Here’s the thing. Sometimes, life stays hard for a long period of time. Despite your best efforts, practicing great action steps, and staying close to the Lord – you can still end up in a place of discouragement or depression. So, how do you cope? What can you do to manage these conditions?

Discouragement Or Depression

It’s a helpless feeling to find yourself in discouragement or depression. Incidentally, many varying emotions accompany this place. Here are some.

1. Often, you feel trapped by problems.
2. Plus, your navigation and maneuverability seems limited.
3. Then, add fear and insecurity about responding.
4. Also, you realize your focus is compromised.
5. Worse yet, productivity comes to a screeching halt.
6. Sadly, peace suffers, and joy plays hide and seek.

 

There are times life feels like this. Interestingly, people make different choices about how to live, and how to handle life challenges.

Different People – Different Choices

Let’s look at different people and scenarios that can lead to discouragement or depression. People of all types can become discouraged or depressed.

1. First, let’s start with the person who has really done their best. This might be you. With all your heart, you jump into life with zeal. You work hard to make good decisions. However, over time, stuff piles up – trials, difficulties, unhealthy relationships, sickness, even war or political tensions. These kinds of scenarios can bring discouragement and even depression.
2. Now, let’s look at the person who didn’t do their best. This could also be you. Maybe you made less than helpful decisions. Additionally, you may not have been pro-active in trying to manage problems. And the natural consequences have pulled you into discouragement or depression.
3. Sometimes, you are backed into a corner by other unhealthy people. It’s tough to be in difficult relationships. Interestingly, this could be people in your work place, family, community, or even a distant person you always end up having to interact with at some point. This, too, can pull you down.
4. Sadly, you might be exposed to impossible circumstances because of someone else’s choices, left to manage the fall-out. This happens more than you might think.
5. Another discouraging scenario is when you are treated unkindly, maligned, slandered, or even betrayed. Often, it’s all lies – but is convenient to someone else’s agenda.

 

These situations can be very hard to endure and to fix. Still, it’s wise to engage helpful steps when you are in these places instead of giving in to being “down.” Matter-of-fact, that pro-active involvement may be the very thing that helps you stay attached to hope. Plus, “ownership” of your responses keeps you healthy.

Helpful Steps During Discouragement Or Depression

These are helpful steps that encourage and direct you into hope when you are discouraged or depressed.

Step One

One of the first things to do when you are discouraged or depressed is to pause. It’s an intentional pause with purpose. Look at things as they really are, not as they appear – nor as you wish they would be. In your pause, train your heart to turn to God. Just come close to Him.

Scripture says – “Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for Him.” (Ps. 37: 7)

Step Two

Next, pour out your heart to God. When you’re discouraged or depressed, press into Christ. Trust Him with your hurt, doubts, and any failures. Don’t depend on your understanding of the situation. Trust Him. He already understands.

Ps. 62:8 says – “Trust in Him at all times . . . pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge.”

Step Three

Critically, let go! Give your tsunami of emotions to Jesus and acknowledge His desire to help you. This doesn’t instantly eliminate your discouragement or depression. However, it does open a door – or even just a small window – to let God’s light in.

Frankly, in order to wrap your arms around hope and light, you need to let go of unhelpful realities.

Scripture says – “Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you.” (Ps. 55:22)

Step Four

Consider your need for comfort and rest. If you are depleted in resources and emotions, triage this to be higher in your priorities.

Scripture says – “You . . . are my Comforter in sorrow. My heart is faint within me.” (Jer. 8:18) And –  “Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Mt. 11:28)

Step Five

At this point, ask God to give you wisdom. Get your bearings. Sometimes God uses a “down” time to help you change direction. Regardless, He knows what needs to happen to best help you.

Jas. 1:5 says – “If any of you lacks wisdom . . . ask God, who gives generously to all . . . and it will be given to you.”

Step Six

Additionally, ask God to heal your heart. Listen intently for His –

• Whispers of love.
• Awareness of your situation.
• Personal provisions for you.
• Intentions to keep all His promises.

 

Scripture says – “I am the Lord who heals you.” (Ex. 15:26c)

Step Seven

Incidentally, often when you face discouragement or depression, you’ve also experienced a loss of some kind. Therefore, it helps to take time to grieve. Many folks skip this step. However, if you don’t grieve, you can become unhealthy.

Alternatively, do these things:

1. Look at what has happened.
2. Admit the loss and hurt.
3. Plus, tears might help.
4. Incidentally, deepest losses are from relationships. It could be through death, severe illness, conflict, changed hearts.
5. Losses can also result from a terrible business transaction, a natural disaster, an accident, declining health, or a denial of some kind.
6. In every case, refuse to be a victim.

 

As you grieve, be aware you can get lost in grieving. Indulging in continual grief or punishing others (or God) in your devastation will not change things for the better.

Tell God your grief and ask for His strength to accept how things are now.

Step Eight

Finally, forgive if you’ve been wronged. It may be appropriate to give another person another chance. Other times, it is better not to. But forgiving sets you free. If you have wronged someone else, ask them to forgive you. Humble yourself. Pride will keep you “down.”

Col. 3:13 says – “Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Step Nine

Now, after the previous steps, move forward, not locked in denial or bitterness. Get up, wash your face, and start to live again. The loss will still be painful. However, positive strokes are healthy.

This is not a “straighten-your-shoulders, steel-faced-go-forward” kind of thrust. That would only keep you “down.” Rather –

• Choose to accept what has happened.
• Equally, acknowledge you didn’t want it to happen.
• Willingly, yield to God’s love and care.
• Happily, let His grace re-write your life story.
• Then, “let go” into God’s capable grip.

 

Step Ten

It may help to talk about your discouragement or depression with someone you trust. Keep building with God and with people. Refuse to be fearful. Remain productive in your daily schedule. Pursue whatever God lays on your heart. Quickly adopt changes – tweeks He shows you. Incidentally, it helps to add a hobby or fun activity.

Staying In Discouragement Or Depression

If you decide to not engage healthy action steps, God’s enemy could outwit you with his schemes. He does not want you to be free. Plus, he’s a skillful liar.

In contrast, you can live an Alive and Active Life. Jesus promises to help. If you go through these steps and stay close to Christ, He will heal your heart and give you joy again. Your life can be healthy and strong.

Discouragement or depression can sometimes linger a long time. That doesn’t change the ideas and action steps we’ve explored. Do all you can to be healthy even if you stay “down.”

Think of it this way. If you don’t do what you can, you could spiral dangerously low. Your life is too precious to just let yourself go there. Stand up and fight. You are worth it.

Incidentally, Jesus empowers you to do hard things even as He holds you close.

Application Thoughts And Questions

1. Have you been practicing a purposeful pause?
2. Are you pouring out your heart to God?
3. Have you let go?
4. Are you turning to God for comfort and rest?
5. How often do you ask God to give you wisdom?
6. Have you asked God to heal your heart?
7. Do you need to take time to grieve something?
8. Who do you need to forgive – or ask forgiveness from?
9. Why not take a step of faith to move forward and start to live again?
10. Sometimes it helps to talk about your discouragement or depression.

 

* Portions of this content came from our book – e-Pistles For An i-Generation: Relevant In A Digital Age – a devotional book that takes you through 1 and 2 Corinthians. You’ll find practical action points that help you know God better and nurture personal growth. You can find this book in our bookstore: www.aliveandactivelife.org/store.

 

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